Nation’s Moviegoers Torn Between Seeing Potentially Awful Film And Just Watching ‘Cats’ Instead

U.S.—The nation’s moviegoers are torn between seeing a potentially awful film and making a safer choice like just going to see Cats instead, sources confirmed this week.

As both Rise of Skywalker and Cats premiere on the same day, the nation was unsure if it should take a gamble on something that might be awful or just go see Cats.

“We’re really torn here — I don’t want to see some movie with a bad plot, way too much CGI, and elements that ruin a classic — so maybe Cats is the way to go instead,” said one man as he tried to figure out which movie he would see this week. “On the one hand, you’ve got an adaptation of an old franchise that will probably be awful, and on the other hand, you’ve got Cats.”

Early previews of one of the two films were conflicted and reserved, with critics saying they needed time to process just how bad it is. Meanwhile, early previews of Cats said, “Hey, it’s Cats. You get what it says on the ticket — no surprises there. There are lots of cats.”