Conservatives confident supporting a convoy of angry, far-right protestors descending on Capital won’t blow up in their faces this time

As the “freedom convoy” rolls closer to Ottawa, Conservative MPs are increasingly voicing their support for the movement, confident that this time will be different.

“So in 2019 we enthusiastically supported the Yellow Vests when they drove to the capital, only for them to turn out to be a xenophobic, alt-right movement,” said MP Andrew Scheer, who has already tweeted his support for the unvaccinated truckers. “But I’m sure this group of angry white men using a specific policy as a launch point to espouse extreme anti-government views will be a swell bunch of fellas.”

“It’s a totally different situation. These guys don’t have vests AND they drive big trucks! There will be way less Islamophobia and way more fun truck honks.”

The convoy plans to arrive in Ottawa on January 29th in order to bring it’s “fight to the doorsteps of our federal government,” but Conservatives are sure they won’t do anything illegal or violent like the Jan 6th protestors in the U.S., because that would be very impolite.

“I can’t wait to meet these wonderful Canadians and talk about the issues that matter to them. Which I’m sure will be limited to the supply chain crisis, and not vere off into politically damaging topics like Western Separation, ending all immigration or the vast Jewish conspiracy to control people’s brains through chips in vaccines,” said MP Martin Shields.

Conservative leader Erin O’Toole has not endorsed the trucker convoy just yet, as he is too busy making plans to be anywhere other than Ottawa by the time the truckers arrive.

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