PLYMOUTH COLONY — Celebration descended into disaster today when what began as a meal of thanksgiving for bountiful blessings erupted into anger due to an attendee wearing a hat emblazoned with the words “Make America Great Someday.”
As citizens of the Plymouth Colony gathered together with their invited guests from the venerable Wampanoag tribe of natives, spirits were high and joy abounded. Things soon took a turn for the worse, however, with the arrival of colonist Donald Hartford Tumpington, long viewed as a politically outspoken firebrand.
“This is to be the greatest and most beautiful among nations,” said Tumpington loudly, eliciting eye rolls from some and exasperated huffs of air from others. “We shall put our colony first and bring about peace and prosperity for everyone!”
R&I – TxPAT