Congress Takes Brief Pause From Sending All Your Tax Dollars To Ukraine To Send Them To Silicon Valley Bank

WASHINGTON, D.C. — There are moments in history when our nation’s elected leaders have had to truly prove their worth during trying times. Today, just such a moment occurred, when members of Congress somberly paused sending all of our tax dollars to Ukraine so they could send them to Silicon Valley Bank instead.

“Think of the poor billionaire tech entrepreneurs,” said one member of Congress while replacing his lapel’s Ukraine pin with a Google logo pin. “We ask that our brothers-in-arms at Lockheed-Martin bear with us until we push this tax hike through while acting like we don’t want to push it through.”

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