The non-mean explanation. I hope.
So, I have been seeing things like this more and more often on social media lately, which is probably not a surprise in the age of OnlyFans, sugar babies, and liberals chanting, “Sex work is real work!”
No one really explains this kind of thing to women, most men only think about it on an instinctual level, and let’s face it, the world has gotten a lot more complicated on this front in the last few decades. I think this has led to some confusion that I hope I can clear up.
Right off the cuff, keep in mind, that for much of history, the standard was that women were expected to be virgins until they were married. Back then, men thought about it in terms of “purity.” Most men didn’t want to permanently tie themselves to a woman who had been “defiled” by other men. It was viewed as disgusting.
Of course, things have changed a lot over the past few decades.
In the post-birth control era, where women can potentially have lots of partners without getting pregnant, pre-marital sex has become commonplace. Moreover, the subtle and overt messages given to women have become muddled and confused.
Women are simultaneously told that they shouldn’t act like “sluts,” but there’s nothing wrong with having sex like a man. Attractive women are heavily encouraged to monetize their beauty via OnlyFans, Patreon, or less controversially, via Instagram, but are also told that the things that get the biggest reaction from men, showing off their bodies or posing provocatively, are skanky. Women are told that the ideal is for them to have as few partners as possible and that they should make men that they like “wait,” but also that there’s a “three date” rule and so if they don’t put out within that timeframe, a man can safely assume she isn’t interested.
Women are also still generally encouraged to get married, but much later. Instead of getting married in their early twenties, now they’re encouraged to have a career, date around, and not commit for life to a man too early.
However, the downsides of that approach are seldom mentioned. One of which is that most unmarried women in their late twenties have had a lot more partners than a woman getting married in her early twenties. More partners mean a much-increased chance of having a kid in tow, which is a huge negative to any man who considers getting seriously involved.
Did / would number of sexual partners influence your decision to commit to and marry someone?
R&I ~ MJM