Wearing a huge foam finger saying ‘KILL KILL KILL’, Senator Chuck Schumer questioned today how someone could have possibly gotten the idea that violence against judges was acceptable.
“Boy, I just can’t fathom where people would get such a notion,” said Schumer as he prepared to burn Kavanaugh in effigy. “Really, it’s a shock. This is my shocked face,” continued Schumer, using his giant foam finger to point protesters towards Justice Barrett’s house.
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Democrats are reportedly hoping the assassination attempt does not distract from their condemnation of inciting political violence. “The timing of the attempted murder is such a bummer for us,” said Schumer. “All you liberals out there, please—NO more trying to assassinate judges until the January 6th hearings are over, ok? Don’t screw this up for us.”
At publishing time, Black Lives Matter leaders were demanding to know how Americans could have gotten the idea that violent riots were an acceptable form of political expression.