MANKATO, MN—Warning that if elected the candidate would show his sinister true colors, acquaintances of Democratic vice presidential nominee Tim Walz alleged Tuesday that his ‘aw, shucks’ persona was merely a cover for his very real ‘gee whiz’ tendencies. “He may act all gosh-and-golly in front of the cameras, but the Walz political machine has spent years covering up the truth about his ‘Oh, for Pete’s sake!’ personality,” said a person close to the Minnesota governor’s family, one of several sources for this story who asked that their name be withheld for fear of reprisal from powerful forces trying to bury what they described as the candidate’s “heckuva” past.
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Article URL : https://theonion.com/sources-allege-tim-walzs-aw-shucks-persona-merely-facade-concealing-true-gee-whiz-tendencies/