Mittwoch, 20. Mai 2020
Karl Frehmann (41), a warehouse clerk from Deutz, is increasingly annoyed by several virologists and epidemiologists who constantly try to explain to him how to operate his forklift.
A few weeks ago, the scientists suddenly appeared at his workplace and have not left Frehmann’s side since.
“If you had loaded two more boxes earlier, you wouldn’t have had to drive twice,” explains one of the virologists, holding up a diagram from the Internet. “If your forklift had three instead of two, you could do 150% more,” says an epidemiologist. “You don’t need reverse gear at all, you can simply push the truck backwards when idling,” a third person is convinced. “I saw other forklift drivers on YouTube who do it completely differently than you do,” complains a doctoral student whose dissertation deals with the Spanish flu and its impact on the population structure of the Basque Country.
In the meantime Frehmann has run out of nerves. “This has been going on for weeks now. None of their clever tips will get me anywhere. What have I done to this guy?” He asks desperately before turning around and shouting at a man in a white coat. “What do you want from me? Don’t you have your own job that you might be more familiar with?”
But instead of disappearing, there are more and more virologists talking to Frehmann every day. A woman with glasses demands that all parcels weighing more than 500 kilograms be placed closer to the main gate, a young lab technician claims that pallets only exist in his imagination, and an older man with a professorial title but without a forklift driver license regularly asks when he is can finally get behind the wheel.
Most recently, Frehmann began to target individual virologists in order to chase them away, but for which he only received further sharp criticism of his driving style and received tips on how he looks even more frightening.