Scientific American wants you to know Jedi Knights are evil “phallic lightsaber” wielders who practice “white saviorism” and so we shouldn’t use the acronym “JEDI” 🤦‍♂️

Approved ~ MJM

“From my point of view, the Jedi are evil!”

I can’t believe this is an actual article, or that the flaming dumpster previously known as “Scientific American” published it.

For those still unversed in the greatness that is Star Wars, the Jedi Knights were the guardians of peace and justice in the galaxy for over a thousand generations.

Because the iconic lightsaber-wielding space wizards are the embodiment of hope and goodness in the Star Wars universe, the woke decided to use the acronym “JEDI” for woke causes.

It stands for “Justice, Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion” initiatives in scientific fields and institutions (because things like math need ideology now).

Apparently, however, the acronym coined by woke people is actually “problematic” according to other woke people, because the Jedi are prone to things like “white saviorism” and “toxically masculinity.”

I’m not joking! The following is not parody!!

You’ll need the Force to get through this mess:

The Jedi are inappropriate mascots for social justice. Although they’re ostensibly heroes within the Star Wars universe, the Jedi are inappropriate symbols for justice work. They are a religious order of intergalactic police-monks, prone to (white) saviorism and toxically masculine approaches to conflict resolution (violent duels with phallic lightsabers, gaslighting by means of “Jedi mind tricks,” etc.). The Jedi are also an exclusionary cult, membership to which is partly predicated on the possession of heightened psychic and physical abilities (or “Force-sensitivity”). Strikingly, Force-wielding talents are narratively explained in Star Wars not merely in spiritual terms but also in ableist and eugenic ones: These supernatural powers are naturalized as biological, hereditary attributes. So it is that Force potential is framed as a dynastic property of noble bloodlines (for example, the Skywalker dynasty), and Force disparities are rendered innate physical properties, measurable via “midi-chlorian” counts (not unlike a “Force genetics” test) and augmentable via human(oid) engineering. The heroic Jedi are thus emblems for a host of dangerously reactionary values and assumptions. Sending the message that justice work is akin to cosplay is bad enough; dressing up our initiatives in the symbolic garb of the Jedi is worse.

I mean, wow!!

This was practically written by a Sith Lord. The only way you get this brainwashed is if you hang out with people who practice the Dark Side.