“He’s a deeply disagreeable, narcissistic showman who treats everyone around him like dirt,” said a spokes-clapperboard for the Groundhog Day franchise.
“Therefore, the gods punish him by making him try to get a peace deal for Ukraine, on a loop, for the best part of a year.
“Every time, it’s the same story. Donald Trump tries to bully Zelensky into giving Russia everything it wants – because that would make the whole business so much simpler. Every time, Zelensky’s European allies come to his aid and he resists.
“Then Trump starts all over again, trying to ram Russia’s wish list down Zelensky’s throat and make him swallow it.
***
“‘Why does Trump try so hard to clinch this peace deal?’ I hear you ask,” said the spokes-groundhog. “Well there’s a love interest Trump is trying to impress, who he’d do anything for.
