An ominous pulsating dark orb with unknown powers is set to replace Kevin McCarthy as the…
Tag: Kevin McCarthy
Matt Gaetz Accuses Kevin McCarthy of Behaving Like an Adult
In a sign of the worsening feud among congressional Republicans, Representative Matt Gaetz lashed out at…
Zelensky Offers to Broker Peace Deal Between Kevin McCarthy and House Republicans
Calling the conflict raging in the U.S. Capitol “a clear and present danger to the world,”…
Kevin McCarthy Claims Most Americans Pay Porn Stars
Offering a vehement defense of Donald J. Trump, Representative Kevin McCarthy told reporters that the former…
After 15 Grueling House Speaker Votes, America’s Long National Nightmare Can Finally Begin
After a week of grueling votes for Speaker of the House — 15 in total —…
Herschel Walker Offers Kevin McCarthy Seven Hundred Dollars to Abort His Speaker Bid
In a possible solution to the stalemate that has gripped the House of Representatives, Herschel Walker…
On Top Of Everything Else, Kevin McCarthy Wetting Bed Again
Sighing as he hid another pair of soiled pajamas deep in his hamper, Rep. Kevin McCarthy…
Desperate Kevin McCarthy Agrees to Two Over-the-Pants Handjobs in Exchange for House Speaker Votes in His Favor
Embattled Rep. Kevin McCarthy offered Republican colleagues two over-the-pants handjobs, redeemable at any time within his…
Republicans Protest Lack of Rioters on January 6th Commission
Casting a dark cloud over the select committee investigating the January 6th insurrection, congressional Republicans protested,…
Trump Orders Kevin McCarthy to Go to Prison in His Place
In what legal experts are calling a highly unorthodox arrangement, Donald J. Trump has commanded Representative…
Kevin McCarthy Doesn’t Want Inquiry Into the Insurrection at the Capitol Because He’s Busy Looking for Hillary’s Emails
Republican House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy has trouble sitting down with Donald Trump’s hand so far…
Kevin McCarthy Blasts Relief Package for Failing to Address Dr. Seuss Crisis
The House Minority Leader, Kevin McCarthy, blasted President Biden’s $1.9 trillion coronavirus-relief package on Sunday, alleging that…