Duffel Blog endorses Tulsi Gabbard: A symbol of our batshit crazy veterans

We know that the batshit crazy veteran is mostly relegated to Vietnam-era movies or wherever Steve Bannon happens to be, but Duffel Blog thinks it’s important the American people remember that the warrior standing guard over your freedom today was probably the same weirdo you knew in grade school who ate paste and collected Soldier of Fortune magazines.

And that’s why Duffel Blog is endorsing Tulsi Gabbard for president in the Democratic primary. Whether it’s doing doing photo ops with Bashar al-Assad, calling America ‘Saudi Arabia’s bitch,’ or getting accused of being a Russian sleeper agent, we cannot think of a better candidate who embodies the sheer fucking craziness that is the American veteran:

• Tulsi Gabbard is a 20-something with a huge beard driving a truck down the highway while monologuing into a camera about socialism.
• Tulsi Gabbard is a screaming match between Dakota Meyer and Bristol Palin on reality TV.
• Tulsi Gabbard is a dog-eared copy of War is a Racket with the forward written by Ron Kovic.
• Tulsi Gabbard is a double-amputee veteran building himself an off-road wheelchair so he can go tearing through the swamp during duck hunting season.
• Tulsi Gabbard is Jim Webb laughing during the 2016 Democratic presidential debates while talking about killing a North Vietnamese soldier.
• Tulsi Gabbard is every line shouted by John Goodman in The Big Lebowski.
• Tulsi Gabbard is James Mattis’ knife hands after James Mattis goes to sleep, but the knife-hands want to go online and blog about how Starbucks hates veterans.

Tulsi Gabbard is the perfect candidate to represent us. Tulsi Gabbard is us.