Health Speculations Swirl As Trump Seen With Damage Numbers Above Head

Amid ongoing concerns over the aging president’s medical status, health speculations reportedly swirled Monday after President Donald Trump was seen with damage numbers above his head. “Recent photos of Trump appear to show him sustaining a series of double- and triple-digit damage values during a press event, fueling rumors that his hit-point pool may be rapidly dwindling,” said medical analyst Rebecca Benson, adding that several smaller numbers in purple, red, and light blue indicated that Trump had taken recurring damage from untreated poison, fire, and frost status effects.

“These damage numbers contradict official White House claims that Trump has been running a completely hitless second term, and several larger numbers with exclamation points after them seem to confirm suspicions that Trump is suffering from critical damage multipliers.

In a man of his age, even low-grade chip damage can be run ending, let alone the base 9999 damage value if Trump’s hidden ‘stroke’ status bar fills completely.