All three people who watch The View were completely unaffected by the talk show’s recent decision to replace…
Tag: The Babylon Bee
RFK Jr. Really Really Hoping Nobody Asks Him Point Blank If He’s Ever Eaten A Cat
A source close to former presidential candidate and current Trump supporter Robert F. Kennedy Jr. says…
David French Founds New Group ‘Evangelicals For Satan’
American commentator and former attorney David French formed a new group Tuesday which he calls “Evangelicals…
Jesus Explains To Disciples That They Are Always Sheep In His Parables Because Sheep Are Really, Really Stupid
After disciples asked the Teacher why He always portrayed them as sheep in parables, Jesus helpfully…
Secret Service Director Resigns In Disgrace For Failing To Assassinate Trump
Secret Service Director Kimberly Cheatle resigned this morning, after miserably failing to assassinate Donald Trump. “I’m…
Satan Miraculously Turns Water Into Bud Light
With a wedding hanging in the balance after running out of booze, Satan stepped up to…
Congratulations! Study Finds You Chose The Only 100% Correct Branch Of Christianity
Good news, Christian! A new study shows that you have chosen the one and only completely correct branch…
Anglican Church Unveils Tuck Friendly Vestments
In a display of liturgical fashion innovation, the Anglican Church has officially unveiled tuck-friendly vestments to…
Republicans Win Emmy For Acting Like Government Spending Makes Them Sad
House Republicans have been awarded their very first Emmy award for outstanding performance in acting like…
Scholars Theorize Disciples Were Chick-Fil-A Workers As They Distributed Food To 5,000 In Record Time
Scholars now believe that the disciples who handed out food so ably to the five-thousand may…
Biden Says He Is Unaware Of Any Classified Docs, Or Who He Is, Or Why He’s Sitting In This Oval-Shaped Office
After another trove of classified documents was found at Biden’s residence, Biden defended himself by claiming…
To Drown Out Justice Jackson, Clarence Thomas Resorts To Wearing Noise-Canceling Headphones
With Ketanji Brown Jackson joining a growing number of women on the United States Supreme Court,…