Biden Aides Forced To Use The Spray Bottle Again

R&A ~ Løki

DETROIT, MI—Presidential candidate Joe Biden’s aides were once again forced to use the spray bottle at a recent campaign event.

As the former vice president wandered the crowd, aides were poised throughout the room, ready to spring into action. Luckily, they were prepared with their locked and loaded spray bottles when the inevitable happened.

“No, Joe! Bad Joe!” the aide said as Biden found a girl in the crowd and began to put his hands on her shoulders. She sprayed him in the face several times with the spray bottle. “What did we talk about? Heel, Joe!”

Biden whined a little but eventually backed off and followed the aide back to the stage.

“He’s learning,” the aide said. “You just have to know when to use positive reinforcement and when to resort to physical punishment.” She said that the campaign has purchased treats that are given to Biden when he’s a good boy and refrains from touching any women or girls at a campaign stop.

“Showing him a little love and care will result in drastically changed behavior if you keep at it,” she said.

“No, Joe! Bad!” she then shouted as she saw Biden wrapped around her leg and was forced to spray him again.