Recently indicted steak salesman Donald J Trump attempted to flee to Mexico early this evening in order to escape charges…
Tag: The Beaverton
Small-dicked man still manages to fuck himself
Former kickboxer and famously small-penised man, Andrew Tate, somehow managed to take the time out of his…
Twitter bans replying ‘lol’ to any joke not made by Elon Musk
Twitter announced a surprising change to its Terms of Use today, informing users that replying ‘lol’, ‘lmao’,…
Kanye changes name to Yitler
In what is just the latest of his many character reinventions, Kanye West has announced he will be…
Woman sets vibrator to “Elon Musk Getting Destroyed On Twitter” setting
While blowing off some steam after a long day at work, Michelle Trudy opened the small…
Musk makes twitter profitable by charging users $8 to leave
ewly minted Twitter owner Elon Musk has announced an ambitious plan to generate profit for the first time in company…
Village Idiot buys Town Square
Surprising both maidens and lads, village idiot Elon Musk has purchased the town square and shall now rule…
Canada reaches ‘Doug Ford is now the voice of reason’ levels of political stupidity
With Doug Ford endorsing the use of the Emergencies Act to end the “Freedom Convoy” protests, Canada has officially become…
Investigation of Catholic Church by Catholic Church finds no wrongdoing by Catholic Church
Pope Francis issued a statement Thursday deeming the sexual assault allegations against Quebec Cardinal Marc Ouellet as ‘insufficient grounds’ to launch…
Being held accountable by federal government clear proof that Trump is not a real billionaire
The FBI enforcing a search warrant on his Mar-A-Lago estate as a result of a DOJ investigation into…
BREAKING: Jesus seeks new brand management
After a tumultuous, decades-long relationship with Evangelical Christians, Jesus H. Christ finally announced He is seeking…
US Supreme Court rules Environmental Protection Agency’s powers do not extend to protecting environment
The US Supreme Court has struck down the Environmental Protection Agency’s (EPA) ability to limit greenhouse pollution from power plants,…