Canada happy for friend who just got out of terrible relationship

Canada is pleased as punch that its closest friend and neighbour is no longer in a…

Twitter suspends Trump’s Twitter account after waking up from four-year coma

Twitter finally suspended Donald Trump’s account for twelve hours today after the President released a video praising a…

Energized Trump scrambling to fit in as much treason as possible before term ends

The White House has witnessed a whirlwind of activity since the election as outgoing president Donald Trump is determined…

Canada extends U.S. border closure to totally arbitrary date of January 21

The Canadian Border Services Agency has announced that the Canada-U.S. border will remain closed until January 21st, “a date…

Mountain Dew celebrates true meaning of Christmas with Dewtivity Scene

Mountain Dew has unveiled a partnership with Safeway that places sponsored Dewtivity Scenes™ in grocery stores across…

Trump forces Eric and Don Jr to compete for last spot on pardon list

Donald Trump has been preparing a slew of preemptive pardons to ensure none of the criminal…

Trump supporters upset President never shot man on Fifth Avenue like he promised he would

Diehard supporters of President Donald Trump are expressing their dismay at the realization that he may never shoot…

Attempted coup in global superpower much goofier than expected

The current attempt by Donald Trump and his Republican allies to subvert the will of the people and…

Toby Keith, 3 Doors Down excited for invitation to play Biden inauguration

Musician Toby Keith and rock band 3 Doors Down have both reported how excited they are to be playing for…

Trump pivots to claiming he actually won 2008 election

After a frantic series of overnight tweets in which he baselessly claimed to have actually won…

Trump announces rallies, lawsuits in bid to make self too pitiful to arrest

As news outlets confirm their earlier projections of a Biden electoral college win, President Donald Trump has announced further intentions…

Biden wins election nine days after winning election

After final vote tallies from Arizona and Georgia, Joe Biden has won the U.S. presidential election only nine days after winning…